Risky Business: Overcoming Fear

You say jump to arms wide open
I am scared but I am willing
Blessed is the one,
Blessed is the one who trusts in You
-Blessed is the One, Daniel Doss Band

Last night I overcame a fear. A small, irrational fear, but a fear nonetheless.

Since I was 15 I have been dancing in various forms and styles. It started with a dance team that was closer to cheer dance, and then transitioned to tap, ballet, jazz, and eventually modern. Then a few years ago I was introduced to Zumba.

Now zumba was like nothing I had ever done before. Mainly because the dance programs I was involved in were Christian based, and pretty strict. We were taught that you don't use your hips. Ever. My friends and I would even joke that dancing with your hips was straight from the devil.

So when I started zumba, it took some getting used to. Obviously if you're going to do latin dance of any form, you'll have to use your hips.

I have gotten more comfortable with that, and really enjoy my class. Our teacher, Alex, has been trying to get me to go on stage to dance with her for a while now. Others do it all the time. Without a care, and without worrying about getting the steps right or everyone watching or looking ridiculous.

But after a little bet with someone else in the class, last night was my night to go on stage, and I was nervous to say the least.

Based on my life experience I shouldn't have been. I have have live many of the past years on the stage through dance recitals, teaching, coaching, and speaking to groups of people. I've been dancing long enough to feel confident in the steps I would have to do. I love to dance. and I kind of love to be on stage in other situations.

I told you it was an irrational fear.

But based on what I had been told when I was younger, I felt awkward having anyone look at me while I was dancing in this form of dance. No one should see me use my hips if it is dance that's from the devil, right?

But the time came, and I did it. And you know what? It wasn't that bad. Sure, it was weird. But I realized that I could dance up there, enjoy it, and no one was judging me. Or if they were they didn't let on.

I get that way too often. Something in my past makes me fear something that I have to do in the present. It creates fear. Sometimes small, sometimes big. Usually irrational.

The quote above is from a song I love. I feel so many times that God is asking me to do something, to just trust in Him, but I am scared to do it. To take an all out flying leap into His arms. Some little experience in my past comes back to haunt me and make me afraid. The thing is that the situation that is affecting me typically involved someone else letting me down, never God letting me down.

I can look back through my life at the times God said, "JUMP!" and He never once let me fall. I may not have ended up where I thought I would, but I never was hurt through what He wanted.

Sometimes my experiences create irrational fears, like being afraid to do zumba on a stage, or thinking that God won't come through for me. It's in those times that I have to be brave. I have to be willing to challenge the fears in my head and my heart and remind myself of what the truth is. I can dance on stage because I'm a dancer, I love to dance, I know the steps, and I'm not afraid of people. I can trust God because He is faithful, trustworthy, never lets me down, and wants what's best for my life.